Jotting down some thoughts

Today was a tough day. I pride myself on being fairly stoic about health issues. I don’t need help from anyone, although I am very supportive of others in need of assistance. I tough it out as long as I can.

I’ve put 135 fairly hilly miles down in the first two days. I felt like my nutrition was coming along and the temperatures had been really awesome. Not too hot, not too chilly. We had long stretches in the sun with no shade. I felt very lucky to be out with 29 other amazing people, raising money and awareness for such an awesome organization.

And really, all it had to do each day was ride my bike. Life doesn’t get any better than that.

Today it was hot (mid-80s). It was hilly. At some point before the first water break I noticed the shade was no longer cooling me off. So I drank more water. I chowed down on trail mix. I ate bananas and energetic bars at every rest stop. Nothing was working and I was feeling worse.

At lunch I started to feel better in the air conditioned sandwich shop as I nibbled on my hoagie and potato chips. I doused myself in water right before we left to get my body cooled down. Meanwhile, everyone’s asking if I feel ok. I tell everyone I think I am running a huge calorie deficit from the previous day.

But I’m not getting better. I start thinking I might be bonking … but my legs feel as fine as they should on day three of a bike ride. My butt doesn’t even really hurt. I just can’t seem to cool off. And even though I’m peeing regularly, why do I feel so bloated and nauseated? My usual hydration mix was failing me.

We get the last water stop at 45 miles and I had to throw in the towel. I felt nauseated even though I devoured a banana and doused myself in water again. Which didn’t help. I’m not cooling down. The support team got me into an air conditioned car with a wet washcloth on my neck and made me sip iced Coke (so glad I bought that at lunch!) while they got all the riders on their way. And then I got a ride back to the hotel.

It’s sad to admit that my first thoughts were about missing the final 23 miles of the day. I was so disappointed with myself. I wanted to be able to do the whole ride, all the miles. But today was not my day.

I took a lukewarm shower and cooled down enough, joining everyone for dinner. I was feeling better but still iffy about whether I should try to ride tomorrow until my friend have me an electrolyte tab to put in my water bottle. That and dinner out the spring back in my step, so I bummed another one and sucked that down this evening.

I know better than to mess around with heat illnesses. And I have no regrets about my decision. But I do have lingering sadness that I couldn’t just push through it. Seeing everyone at the end of the day and hearing their stories from the last miles was good … It’s just my story is different this time around.

I’ve never had to be SAG’d before. And I’m thankful to have been taken care of by the amazing support team on this ride. Truly this has been an epic adventure. I just need to get over my unfounded feelings of letting everyone down by not finishing the whole day.

When I have time I will write a proper post about the ride. It’s been amazing and I’ve loved almost every minute of it.

One thought on “Jotting down some thoughts

  1. Funny how our melons work isn’t it? Someone else drops and it’s all well wishes and “hope you’re okay”… You drop out and you think you’re letting everyone down. I can so relate.

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